The Long Hard Shaft

I’m amazed any of you still follow me, but I’m not going to be here any more. I am going to remaking my Clint blog, but somewhere new. If you want the url, send me an ask or talk to me on skype.

2 months ago with 1 note




Someone's been busy whilst I've been gone. Seems like I need to start a support group for those who have felt victimised by Wanda's sodomy.

stillmanlierthanyou:

stillmanlierthanyou:

Don’t even try to pretend you felt victimized, Clint.  Not with the way you begged for more.

It comes and goes, I’m working on stamping my nice streak out completely, don’t worry.  The other Wanda, yeah?  The one you boned the Doombot of?  Yeah, we definitely don’t want that—feelings are awful, and should be destroyed for the benefit of all.

[She smiles back—of course she does, how could she not?  And as stupid as it is, her heart flutters a but when his lips press to her palm.]

I believe you.  I’d be able to smell the self-loathing on you if you had.

Riiiiiiiiiiight. You keep workin’ on that. Say what y’like about feelin’s, but you’re still nice to me. [Well - nicer than she is to the other boys, at least, but he’ll leave it vague - lips curved in a smile as his own fingers take hold of her hand.]

You know me too well. Just the usual amount of self-loathing on me today. Oh - I’m sorry - about the things I said then. I didn’t mean any of it. I was just - it messed me up more than I expected.

4 months ago with 8 notes — via stillmanlierthanyou



askantman:

Yeah.

Oh and Greer and I found a baby and she’s ours now.

…Nothing unusual there then.

4 months ago with 10 notes — via looktotheants, © arrowsandsnark



askantman:

They’re all well.

Uh. Hm. Oh. You missed me getting shot. But that’s about it.

Wow, seems it’ been pretty dead then.

You got shot? I’d ask if you’re okay, but you’re here, so I’m gonna go with a yes on that.

4 months ago with 10 notes — via looktotheants, © arrowsandsnark




/shows up months late to ur door with starbucks. just kidding. he can't afford starbucks./ Heeeeeeeeey -

purekickassery:

I’m sorry, I don’t think I have a sometimes boyfriend role to fill. Maybe try the elderly lady next door.

You called me your boooooyfriend.

Fell into an alternate dimension. You know how it is!

4 months ago with 2 notes — via purekickassery




Someone's been busy whilst I've been gone. Seems like I need to start a support group for those who have felt victimised by Wanda's sodomy.

stillmanlierthanyou:

stillmanlierthanyou:

Don’t even try to pretend you felt victimized, Clint.  Not with the way you begged for more.

I don’t have to make up my mind, you can be both.  Some horrible, adorable bird-dog mutation.

[She squints at him, hard.  Abruptly, she closes the space between them, taking his face gently in her hands and giving him a long, searching look.]

Promise me you didn’t.

Woah, don’t get all nice on me. I might actually start havin’ feelings for you, an’ we know how that goes. I mean, remember the time I indirectly caused Wanda to go batshit? Aha -

{He smiles, turning his head to press a kiss to her palm]

I promise.

4 months ago with 8 notes — via stillmanlierthanyou




I thought your superpower was being a pain in the ass.

Oooh, witty.

4 months ago with 1 note




Careful, someone might think you're flirting.

You mean that isn’t my superpower? I’ve been lied to all these years.

4 months ago with 1 note




aaaaaayyyy

cellobowsandarrows:

cellobowsandarrows:

Barton.

*clinghugs*

Did not. Totes did not. You’re deluded Barton.

The lady doth protest too much.

4 months ago with 14 notes — via cellobowsandarrows




Someone's been busy whilst I've been gone. Seems like I need to start a support group for those who have felt victimised by Wanda's sodomy.

stillmanlierthanyou:

stillmanlierthanyou:

Don’t even try to pretend you felt victimized, Clint.  Not with the way you begged for more.

Of course I have, Tweety!  You know how I love to gnaw those bird-bones of yours.  Where have you been?

Tweety? What happened to puppy? Make your mind up, lady.

Ah, you know, Avengers stuff. Just not with any of the Avengers. Don’t worry, I didn’t go off on a murder spree like I said I would -

4 months ago with 8 notes — via stillmanlierthanyou